On-demand workshop with leading couples therapist Terry Real
Understand why, where, and how closeness has faded in your relationship ā and clear action steps you can take right now to deepen your connection.
šļø Available now ā learn at your own pace
100% Money-Back Guarantee
Whether you’re in a marriage that feels like roommates, whether you’re recognizing the resentment that is coming up in your relationship, Terry is asking us all to look at where you’re at as one giant opportunity.ā
ā Mel Robbins
#1 New York Times bestselling author and award-winning podcast host
Not an empty house or the lack of day-to-day contact we often associate with loneliness.
But that sense of feeling alone despite having someone to share a bed, a kitchen, a life with.
From the outside, maybe it all looks fine. Good, even. And yet thereās still some deeper part of you who doesnāt feel met. Itās almost like you’re watching your own relationship through a pane of glass.
And this kind of feeling is often so hard to explain. Thereās no screaming, no betrayal, nothing you could point to and say that ā that’s the problem. Just a gap between you thatās slowly getting bigger. And a growing sense that you may be carrying a discontent, a sadness, an anger that they have no idea is even there.
So you start to wonder if you’re the problem. Maybe you want too much. Maybe this is just what long-term love looks like and you should be grateful.
Perhaps you tried to bring it up once ā dropped a hint, or said it straight out ā and it turned into a fight, or a blank look, or a “what are you talking about, everything’s fine.” So you swallowed it. And told yourself to stop making a big deal out of nothing.
But it isn’t nothing. That ache is real. That longing to be known by the person who’s supposed to know you best ā it’s one of the most human things there is.
Terry Real has spent more than 40 years helping couples facing this exact dilemma and the good news is: there is a way to drive connection deeper with your partner.
And in this self-paced workshop, heāll show you how to get there.
More time together, more date nights, a weekend away together ā just the two of us. And then wonder why we end up feeling even more alone.
The truth is, the closeness we’re missing isn’t the kind more contact can fix. But no one ever taught us that, so weāre left feeling the emptiness and assuming something’s wrong with us ā or our partner.
Thankfully, thereās another way out of this. And in your 3 hours together, Terry Real will help you identify exactly where your connection went quiet, and how to bring it back to life.
Over 3 hours, Terry will walk you through the steps that take you from feeling alone to feeling close again:
1
From understanding what intimacy really is to how youāre unconsciously blocking the very thing youāre seeking so you know how to move forward.
2
Terry will guide you through the 5 domains of intimacy ā helping you give an honest assessment of how well you and your partner are doing in each.
3
From how to communicate effectively when youāre hurt, how to ask for more of what you want ā and invite it from your partner ā youāll learn to close the gap between you.
We tend to imagine transformation as one dramatic moment that changes everything. But connection is something you do ā and you can learn to do it better.
In this self-paced workshop with Terry Real, you’ll learn:
You don’t have to keep feeling lonely in your own relationship. You just need someone to show you the way back into connection. Let Terry be your guide.
āSo liberating for me when I realize that I am the one who can change.
I loved Terry’s emphasis that you can only change yourself, not your partner. I now understand how my journey towards healthy self esteem has provided me with the perfect foundation to become a loving partner and to create the intimate relationship I have always desired.ā
ā Elaine Van Melle
You don’t have to keep feeling lonely in your own relationship. You just need someone to show you the way back into connection. Let Terry be your guide.
Available now: Terry will walk you through why connection fades and how to rebuild connection.
It’s yours to keep and return to whenever you need it.
get advice on your own situation in the workshop exercises.
you’re not the only one feeling this way, and there’s something quietly powerful about realizing that.
All of it for just $47.
Including many who were certain the closeness was gone for good.
He’s the creator of Relational Life Therapy (RLT) and the New York Times bestselling author of Us: Getting Past You and Me to Build a More Loving Relationship. Known for his warm, no-nonsense honesty, Terry has spent his career teaching people the relational skills most of us were simply never taught ā how to stop the patterns that quietly pull partners apart, and how to build the kind of deep, lasting connection we all long for.
In this workshop, he brings that four decades of experience straight to you.
Hear how Terry Realās tools, workshops, and courses have helped others facing similar situations.
āA 100% turn around on how I see my relationship and how I speak to my husband.
I was never taught how to be in an equal relationship and really needed to be told words/phrases on how to speak ā i.e. to request rather than demand or direct. That was a game changer and easy once I was given words to use ā I would have stumbled for months or years!ā
ā Jan Moberg
on the Getting What You Want From Your Relationship course
āIt resolved the incessant arguments that were happening in the marriageā¦
And showed us how to navigate them successfully from conflict, disharmony, repair and back to harmony.
ā Ellen Burbano
on the Getting What You Want in Your Relationship course
āI am cherishing every moment of this journey.
I feel Iām getting to a point where āthe dotsā are beginning to connect for me. Attending a workshop like this and listening closely to Terry et al, made the connections between those dots stronger and clearer, and assisted me to validate my interpretation of all of my readings to date.
My journey to understand my SELF and heal, to become a better person, husband, father etc has been a long road. I am cherishing every moment of this journey.ā
ā Jim MacDougall
on the Unstuck workshop
āWe really appreciate the experiences that renewed our marriage celebrating our 50th this year!
We participated in Terry Realās recorded programs and an experiential workshop. We have since been more patient and understanding with ourselves, each other, and even with other people in our lives.
Terryās distinct philosophy of gentle honesty and mutual respect is a gem. What we learned about ourselves and each other has changed the way we think and live as a couple every day.
You don’t have to keep feeling lonely in your own relationship. You just need someone to show you the way back into connection. Let Terry be your guide.
All of it for just $47.
This is a self-paced workshop available now, so you can begin whenever you are ready.
You receive lifetime access to the workshop and can work through it on your own schedule.
As soon as you sign up, youāll receive an email with your access information and a link to the private learning platform.
Yes. The workshop is available now, with lifetime access through the private learning platform.
There are no guarantees. If you are committed to making your relationship work, this workshop will introduce you to relational skills that will help you reignite your connection and ease the sense of loneliness youāve been carrying. However, this workshop is not intended as a substitute for therapy and if you feel you need extra support, we recommend searching our website directory for an RLT-certified practitioner in your area.
No ā you can join with your camera off and say nothing for the whole workshop. Terry will do most of the talking as he shares insights and skills designed to help you. He will open up space for Q&A, and only those who wish to share their experiences or ask a question will be called on.
You can join alone or together. Terry will share from his four decades of experience working with couples and individuals grappling with the feeling of distance and disconnection in their relationship. It is of course wonderful if youāre able to join together but you will be able to apply the skills Terry will share to change how you show up in the relationship, which will invite your partner to also change how they respond.
This workshop is designed to help people in their own relationships and Q&A will be reserved for this rather than clinical application of the work. However, what you will explore will help you gain an understanding of how loneliness and distance can slowly grow between couples, and some of the steps to help them reconnect.
Please contact us at support@terryreal.com.
Here’s everything you get:
All of it for just $47.
Homestudy Course Continuing Ed Details
This Home study course is approved for continuing education hours as described below.
NBCC (National Board of Certified Counsellors)
Relational Life Institute (RLI) has been approved by NBCC as an Approved Continuing Education Provider, ACEP No. 7495. Programs that do not qualify for NBCC credit are clearly identified. Relational Life Institute (RLI) is solely responsible for all aspects of the programs.
The course content is appropriate for Intermediate level clinicians.
Relational Life Therapy (RLT) is a transformative approach to couples work created by Terry Real that produces deep, profound, and lasting change in both individual partners and their relationships. Unlike traditional therapy models that separate character work from couples therapy, RLT integrates psychodynamic principles, family systems theory, feminism, trauma work, and addiction recovery into a cohesive framework designed to help people live authentically connected lives. This course introduces therapists to RLT’s distinctive methodology, which challenges conventional therapeutic practices by confronting difficult behaviors from the very first session, addressing both shame and grandiosity, taking sides when appropriate, and using judicious self-disclosure to model relationality.
Participants will learn how RLT differs from other modalities by doing deep character transformation and trauma work within the couples session itself, using the relationship as a crucible for accelerated healing.
This 3-hour foundational training covers the three core phases of RLT treatment: waking up the client through “joining through the truth,” conducting trauma work to understand and heal the adaptive child, and building relational skills that move clients beyond patriarchal patterns toward genuine intimacy. Participants will explore the tri-part model of the psycheāthe wise adult, adaptive child, and wounded childāand learn to identify the recursive feedback loops (“the more the more”) that keep couples stuck. The course addresses how to work with both one-up (grandiose) and one-down (shame-based) positions, understanding that true love requires neither superiority nor inferiority but relational democracy. Through lecture, demonstration videos, and case examples, therapists will gain practical tools for helping clients shift from knee-jerk reactivity to relational mindfulness, transforming their capacity for authentic connection with themselves and others.
Identify the three phases of Relational Life Therapy (Waking Up the Client, Trauma Work, and Skill Building) and their sequential role in the therapeutic process.
Differentiate between the three parts of the psyche in RLT (Wise Adult, Wounded Child, and Adaptive Child) and their functions in client behavior.
Describe the technique of “Joining Through the Truth” and how it builds therapeutic alliance while confronting difficult behaviors.
Distinguish between modeling and reacting as the two ways the Adaptive Child is formed in response to childhood experiences.
Explain the therapeutic benefits of conducting trauma work with the partner present in the room rather than in individual therapy.
Assess the three preconditions (untreated psychiatric disorders, active addictions, and acting out behaviors) that must be addressed before proceeding with couples therapy.
Contrast individual empowerment versus relational empowerment when teaching clients to stand up for themselves within relationships.
Apply the biosphere metaphor to help couples understand their interdependence and move from a control-based model to ecological wisdom.
3 NBCC credit hours
This course is $47.00
There is no conflict of interest for this program.
Terry Real, LICSW: Terry Real is the bestselling author ofĀ I Donāt Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression, the straight-talkingĀ How Can I Get Through to You? Reconnecting Men and Women, The New Rules of Marriage: What You Need to Make Love Work and most recently Us: Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship just debuted in June 2022.Ā Terry founded the Relational Life Institute, offering workshops for couples, individuals, and parents as well as a professional training program for clinicians. Ā Terryās work, with its rigorous commonsense approach, speaks to both men and women. A proponent of āfull-throttle marriage,ā Terry has been called āthe most innovative voice in thinking about and treating men and their relationships in the world today.ā approval.
Please Note:Ā Licensing Boards change regulations often and while we attempt to stay abreast of their most recent changes, if you have questions or concerns about this course meeting your specific boardās approval, we recommend you contact your board directly to obtain a ruling.
Contact information: ACEP Administrator & Operations Director for Relational Life Institute (RLI), Lisa Sullivan follows: 291 Nahanton Street, Newton, MA 02459;Ā
617-861-3030 lisa@relationallife.com; www.relationallife.comĀ
The Relational Life Institute is pleased to offer:
The RLT Level 1 Training Course
Relational Life Institute (RLI) has been approved by NBCC as an Approved Continuing Education Provider, ACEP No. 7495. Programs that do not qualify for NBCC credit are clearly identified. Relational Life Institute (RLI) is solely responsible for all aspects of the programs.Ā
FORMAT: Five LIVE Online Sessions on Zoom, facilitated by Kate Harris, Phd; plus teaching by Terry Real, LICSW; Cathy Hill, PhD; and Anna Sterk, LMFT
Continuing Ed credits offered:Ā 10 credit hours for 5 Classes
At the completion of this course, all participants will be invited by email to purchase the 10 CE credits for a $40 fee. To receive a certificate, you must attend the full course. There is no partial credit, attendance will be taken.
Content:
Over five live classes youāll be introduced to the powerful principals behind Relational Life Therapy (RLT). RLT Level 1 is designed to give you an in-depth introduction to the theory and practice of the RLT model.Ā
Discover the differences between RLT and traditional psychodynamic therapy. Also considered are the stances of āone-down shameā and āone-up grandiosityā in couples; according to RLT, true intimacy can only happen when partners are āsame-asā with each other. RLT is about action and swift results, helping people to make major changes to the negative parts of their character, and the critical role and stance of the therapist is described. Presented also are the concepts of Relational Mindfulness, Joining Through the Truth, and psychological patriarchy.
RLT Level 1 is the first step toward RLT certification and will prepare you for the Level 2 & 3 trainings.
Learning Objectives: At the completion of this course, participants can expect to:
Ā Ā
Throughout the course, youāll learn:Ā
Target Audience: Social Workers, MFTs, Counselors, Substance Abuse Counselors, Nurses, andĀ LMHCs, LMFTās, Educators, Chemical Dependency CounselorsĀ
Course Content Level: The course content is appropriate for Beginner level clinicians.
Cost: $497 in full; or 3 payments of $179 each
Cancelation Policy: You may request a refund up to 2 days after the first live session.
Please contactĀ support@terryreal.comĀ if you wish to cancel your purchase.
If you need special accommodations or have questions, please contact us.
Registering for the course on the RLI website for is required to receive a Continuing Ed Certificate.
FAQās
How do I receive the Zoom link?
The Zoom link is emailed to you from ZOOM when you register for the course. If you do not receive the link, please contact us at support@terryreal.com
Should the name you register with match your Zoom name?
Yes, your first and last both names must be entered on your registration and then displayed on the screen during all classes. Please do not use nicknames, or employee ID numbers or log into Zoom using a co-worker or family memberās Zoom Account as this will post you as ABSENT.
When will I get my certificate?
Certificates will be available within tenĀ businessĀ days of the event. Certificates will be emailed to the email address you used to register for the course.
Please contact our Support team if you have any questions support@terryreal.com
Instructorās Bios:
Terry Real, LICSW: Terry Real is the bestselling author ofĀ I Donāt Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression, the straight-talkingĀ How Can I Get Through to You? Reconnecting Men and Women, The New Rules of Marriage: What You Need to Make Love Work and most recently Us: Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship just debuted in June 2022.
He founded the Relational Life Institute, offering workshops for couples, individuals, and parents as well as a professional training program for clinicians. Ā Terryās work, with its rigorous commonsense approach, speaks to both men and women. A proponent of āfull-throttle marriage,ā Terry has been called āthe most innovative voice in thinking about and treating men and their relationships in the world today.ā
Kate Harris, PhD: Licensed Clinical Psychologist
Kate is a Clinical Psychologit and a certified Martha Bec, North Star Coach. In 2015, Kate watched Terry Real work live with 5 couples and was instantly committed to becoming an RLT therapist. Kate believes that RLT honors āthe worth and dignity of all peopleā and it aligns clearly with her own personal values. After attending a Relationship Bootcamp workshop, she and her husband learned first hand the tools Terry reaches and they continue to use them today to deepen their 32 year relationship. Kate became RLT Certified in 2018 and is a valued teacher.
Anna Sterk, LMFT
Anna began training in RLT with Terry Real in 2012 and has been providing therapy, Essential Skills Bootcamps, consultationĀ and supervision through the RLT model for years; Anna was thrilled to have the opportunity to teach and train practitioners as faculty with the Relational Life Institute (RLI) beginning in 2022.Ā Anna’s style as a therapist, teacher, and supervisor is to balance compassion and collaboration with direct feedback. Anna’s roots are in systems theory and culturalĀ studies, which was a natural fit for the RLT model, and supports her goal ofĀ teaching the skills to navigate long term relationships and support relational living for both clients and students alike. As RLI Faculty, Anna teaches theĀ Practicum courses and Small Group Mentoring for RLT certification students, along with special topic courses.
Cathy Hill, Ph.D., R. Psych:
Cathy Hill began training in RLT in 2010 after attending her first Relationship Bootcamp and from that experience was determined that Terry needed to teach others to do RLT. Cathy persisted in this idea and Terry ended up having Cathy set up adanced training for his senior therapists which was very well received. Soon after she was named Director of Training for RLI. Cathy is trained in the āscientist-practitionerā model, and is devoted to getting RLT āevidence-basedā which requires excellent in training in order to translate into excellence in practice.
CONFLICT of Interest: There is no known conflict of interest or commercial support for this event.
Grievance Procedure:
If a student believes they have been discriminated against, they can submit a written
complaint that includes their name, address, phone number, location, date, and a
detailed description of the issue. If a student with a disability disagrees with the
accommodation provided or has any other grievances, they can schedule a meeting to
discuss and attempt to find a solution together. If the student is still not satisfied with the
accommodation after further discussion, they can contact the Operations Director for
the Relational Life Institute (RLI), Lisa Sullivan, via phone, email, or mail. If the
grievance cannot be resolved, the complainant will be advised to contact the
appropriate Ethics Committee or Licensing Board. The Operations Director will keep all
grievances and their resolutions confidential in locked files. A copy of this Grievance
Procedure is available upon request.
Contact information: ACEP Administrator & Operations Director for Relational Life Institute (RLI), Lisa Sullivan follows: 291 Nahanton Street, Newton, MA 02459; 617-861-3030 lisa@relationallife.com