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Learn to Use Infidelity as a Catalyst for Deep Transformation — In Your Clients and Their Relationships
Get instant access to 5 x 90-minute classes with Terry Real.
Enroll in Working With Infidelity today for just $248 (usual price $497)
Here’s Everything You Receive
5 x 90-MINUTE CLASS RECORDINGS WITH TERRY REAL
Each class focuses on a particular aspect of working with infidelity. You have lifetime access to the course, so you can refer back to it whenever you wish.
Class 1: RLT’s Unique Approach to Infidelity
Class 2: Helping the Hurt Partner Heal
Class 3: Accountability Without Shame
Class 4: Turning Crisis Into Transformation
Class 5: Rebuilding After the Storm
Plus these exciting bonuses:
RLT’s (Relationship Life Terry) Approach to Trauma
In this 5-part video series, Terry Real takes you deep into the RLT approach to healing trauma, from why we conduct inner child work in the couples context to how trauma operates in couples.
Esther Perel on Infidelity: The State of Affairs
A 60-minute talk from psychotherapist and NYT bestselling author, Esther Perel, who doesn’t shy away from the opportunities infidelity can open up for a new relationship within an old one.
Learn a New Framework For Infidelity
Moving Clients From Shame & Punishment to Hope & Repair
50% of people come to couples therapy due to some form of infidelity. We see it in our offices frequently, yet it’s still an area that holds great doubt, uncertainty, and even fear for many therapists… Facing the devastating trauma, deep betrayal, and shattered trust in the aftermath of an affair is a particularly stirring issue for us. Many of us have been touched by infidelity personally—in our own relationships or as children.
Managing our own feelings and acting as a container for our clients’ emotions, while trying to constructively move them forward steep challenge.
But helping couples come back from an affair is also one of the most rewarding parts of couples therapy.
It presents you with one of the biggest opportunities to bring about transformation—in each partner and the relationship as a whole.
Too often, the focus is on restoring the old—often problematic—equilibrium. But the truth is, many couples manage to return to the old status quo on their own: two-thirds of couples survive infidelity…
But in RLT, we strive for more.
We use the crisis of infidelity to make way for something completely new—a robust and healthy relationship where partners experience true intimacy like never before!
Join Terry Real, the creator of Relational Life Therapy (RLT), to discover a fresh approach to working with infidelity that moves beyond the traditional victim/perpetrator framework into one that builds hope and opportunity for real repair.
Throughout five 90-minute LIVE classes, Terry will teach you the exact RLT framework he has used to help thousands of couples come back from infidelity with a stronger, healthier relationship than before.
How the RLT Approach Will Elevate Your Work With Infidelity
Build Confidence
You’ll feel certain in your ability to offer your clients more than a return to their old reality.
You’ll feel assured that you can offer them something more: hope and optimism for a stronger, healthier relationship.
Gain Clarity
Equipped with the powerful RLT tools that Terry has used for 30 years to guide couples through the crisis, you’ll know exactly how to work with infidelity, harnessing it as a mechanism for dramatic and permanent transformation.
Feel Energized
It’s exhausting when you can’t help your clients the way you want to. But with the skills you’ll learn inside this course, you’ll feel reinvested in your work as you see the transformations unfold before you.
What You’ll Learn
The Crisis is Over:
Now What?
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Teaching each partner the relational skills for a stronger and healthier relationship:
- Restoring relational joy
- Transmission/reception work
- How to amplify each partner’s progress as they move towards true intimacy
- Demarcating the crisis as having passed
- Celebrating the new transformed relationship—perhaps it’s time to renew wedding vows
An Overview of the RLT Approach to Infidelity
- The RLT perspective on infidelity and how it differs from other models
- The goals of treatment: using the crisis as a springboard for transformational change in the character of each partner and the essential character of the union itself
- The phases of treatment: containment and transformation
- How to be the Wise Adult in the room: approaching infidelity issues from the center of health
- How to deal with countertransference: managing your own feelings around infidelity
- The importance of not imposing a model of fidelity on your clients
- Identifying and disentangling from your own biases and assumptions about fidelity
The Hurt Partner: Infidelity as a Trauma
- Understanding infidelity as a trauma for the hurt partner: their basic assumptions about their partner and relationship have been shattered
- Creating a platform for the hurt partner to deal with the trauma of betrayal and deceit
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Exploring the 2 questions of hurt partners:
- How could you do that?
- How do I know you won’t do it again?
- The question of disclosure: should everything be disclosed? How and when should it happen?
- Reassuring behaviors: how to be the voice of what’s appropriate, moderate, and respectful
- What ultimately helps hurt partners regain trust
An Overview of the RLT Approach to Infidelity
- Shifting the question from “why do people cheat?” to “why don’t they cheat?” - identifying what force has overridden the power of “no”
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The 3 reasons behind the lack of ability to say “no” to infidelity:
- Normal human weakness
- The character of the unfaithful partner
- The character of the long-term relationship
- Realistic remorse: the involved partner doesn’t need to regret the infidelity, but they must regret the consequences of their actions
- The involved partner must begin with accountability, but not shame or self-attack
Infidelity as an Opportunity for Transformation
- The old relationship is over. The question now is: can we help our clients forge a new one?
- Understanding how to use the crisis of infidelity as an opportunity for deeper transformation in the relationship
- Moving beyond the victim/perpetrator framework into one that builds hope
- Identifying the dysfunctional relational stances that contributed to the infidelity & how to address them
- Shifting from what happened to understanding why it happened
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Teaching each partner the relational skills for a stronger and healthier relationship:
- Restoring relational joy
- Transmission/reception work
- How to amplify each partner’s progress as they move towards true intimacy
Who Should Take This Course?
This course is for you if you’re a therapist, coach, or mental health practitioner who wants to…
Key topics you’ll explore:
- Harness the crisis of infidelity as a mechanism for profound change in the relationship, forging true intimacy between partners.
- Learn how to effectively approach infidelity as a trauma for the hurt partner, helping them to tell their story, express their grief, and make sense of what happened.
- Understand the factors that stop people from saying “no” to affairs: how to identify them and address them to bring about deep, lasting character transformation.
- Confidently be the Wise Adult in the room and the sound voice of what is appropriate and respectful when it comes to reassuring behaviors and expressing emotions.
- Confront and disentangle from your own biases and assumptions around infidelity, learning to work with different models of fidelity.
About Terry Real,
the Creator of RLT
Terry Real, LICSW, is an internationally recognized family therapist, sought-after speaker, and bestselling author, who has transformed how we approach relationships.
He is the creator of Relational Life Therapy (RLT), a groundbreaking therapeutic approach that equips people with the essential relational skills to build and sustain authentic connections—to themselves, each other, and the planet as a whole.
The author of four books, Terry’s most recent is the New York Times bestseller, Us: Getting Past You and Me to Build a More Loving Relationship, which guides readers toward deeper intimacy and fulfillment. Known as “the turnaround guy,” Terry is famous for his extraordinary ability to save couples on the brink of divorce. Through his esteemed training school, the Relational Life Institute, he has trained thousands of mental health practitioners in his RLT method to date.
Terry is committed to relational empowerment, helping everyone develop the skills needed for meaningful, lasting relationships.
What Others Say About Terry and RLT
Frequently Asked Questions
Is this course pre-recorded?
Yes you receive instant access to all 5 90-minute classes with Terry Real as soon as you enroll. And with lifetime access, you can refer back to the material anytime you need.
What if I don’t work with couples? Can I still join?
While the course material is predominantly framed within the context of couples therapy, the theory and techniques may be useful for therapists working with individuals looking to heal from the hurt of past affairs or to break their patterns of infidelity.
Is this course for couples looking to heal from infidelity?
This course is designed for clinicians (therapists, coaches, and mental health practitioners) to provide them with the tools they need to get people through the crisis in a way that promotes growth. This course does not contain advice for couples on how to come back from infidelity. For specific help on how to build true intimacy in your personal relationships, we recommend Terry’s online course The Art of Relational Living.
What’s your refund policy?
We’re confident you’ll enjoy Working With Infidelity, but we offer a 100% money-back guarantee for your peace of mind. If, for whatever reason you’re not completely satisfied, please contact us at support@terryreal.com within 14 days after purchase and we’ll issue you a full refund, no questions asked.
